Huh?: a couple poems

Huh? Part One

I think we can all agree
That being straight and white
Is simply the best
Completely superior

Wait a second, I thought we were talking about teeth!

Huh? Part Two

So long there, friend
So sad to see you go,
to throw it all way

We all knew the potential you had
If you just came out of of your shell,
and showed everyone the greatness within

Wait, we’re talking about a pistachio, right?

Welcome: a poem

Welcome to the internet, young man
An extra universe we’ve made
Fits right in your pocket
Sits right on your desk

Pretty women? Course they’re here
Infinite in number, in fact
Some joke, some dance, and some fuck
Quite a paradise we’ve made

But know this, young man,
None of them will ever help you
Ever
So let’s put the phone down, get out there
Try to get good at something
Anything

The Ship: a poem

We find ourselves on a ship
Drifting through an endless ocean
No one can swim
No one can steer
Yet we follow a steady course

We find ourselves on a sinking ship
Taking on the ocean’s water
The port men scurry about with their buckets
Bailing out the water
Searching for the leak

The starboard men, of their own free will,
Take their buckets in their own two hands,
Bailing the sea in

The men at the bow,
smug look on their faces,
hold up the nautical handbook,
reciting the appropriate use of buckets
Problem solved!

As Seen on I-5: a poem

“Just Married!” the rear window said
The car tilted back, towed down the highway
Dented fender, broken bumper
How will this story be told?
As hilarity or foreboding?
That hinges on the quality of the marriage